If they said they were unhappy or acted like they had a problem when they were young, they might have been treated unfairly by their parents or caregivers. This may be able to work for a while in a relationship but having a conflict-avoidant partner may cause drug addiction treatment you to feel like you will be unable to work out your problems. Issues may never seem to get handled because you cannot talk to them. Conflict avoidance occurs when a person refuses to admit that they may have a conflict with someone else.
What is Conflict Avoidance and How to Overcome It?
To maintain harmony in their relationships, people with the avoidance conflict management style may not speak up when upset or have unmet needs. Conflict avoidance is quite common, as many individuals find it challenging to confront disagreements head-on. Some may avoid conflict occasionally, while for others, it’s a habitual response.
Share: How does avoidance of conflict affect your relationship?
Over time, avoiding conflict creates loneliness, bitterness, anger and contempt in us while creating confusion, isolation, frustration, and disengagement from partners. Good conflict is how two or more people exist in a relationship as separate people. There how to deal with someone who avoids conflict are various reasons why people tend to avoid confrontation, including 1) Extreme fear of rejection, abandonment, or being seen in a negative light by others.
Conflict Avoidance: Why It’s Harmful, How to Overcome It & More
Taking a step back when emotions run high can help you calm down and approach the situation more rationally. There’s a reason you or your partner is conflict avoidant and that reason deserves some empathy! Conflict avoiders have learned this way of being and there’s a basis or motive for these actions. They see some yucky consequence for sharing their true thoughts and feelings so be as patient and compassionate as possible. I talk a lot about the importance of doing the work before a conversation to better ensure success.
Common Signs of Conflict Avoidance in Daily Life
It could take a lot of talking and getting them to understand that they can say what they feel. There are a few reasons someone may be skilled at avoiding conflict in relationships. If you note any of these in your relationship, think about reading more about a conflict-avoidant spouse. While it can be tempting to bottle up feelings like anger and frustration by not rocking the boat, conflict-avoiding tendencies can take a toll on your mental health. Remember, you’ve got to connect to correct so showing empathy and compassion if your partner is a conflict avoider is the best way to create a space where they’ll start sharing what’s real. In this same vein, you want to emphasize that you’re a team; you’re not going anywhere and you’ll get through this together.
Have a weekly meeting with your partner
While it can feel like a quick fix to keep the peace, avoiding conflict often leads to unresolved issues simmering below the surface. Sometimes, it’s learned behavior from childhood, where expressing disagreement was discouraged or led to negative consequences. Understanding these underlying reasons is crucial for addressing and overcoming conflict avoidance. Individuals might prioritize short-term peace over addressing underlying problems, creating a temporary illusion of stability.
- Our content is thoroughly reviewed by experts to ensure that we offer high-quality and reliable relationship advice.
- Some people may not have developed effective conflict-resolution skills due to their upbringing or previous relationships.
- By doing so, we not only improve our own lives but contribute to creating a world where open, honest communication and constructive problem-solving are the norm rather than the exception.
- Conflict avoidance may result from how you perceive conflict in relationships.
- At its core, conflict avoidance is a psychological response to discord, characterized by the tendency to sidestep, ignore, or withdraw from confrontational situations.
powerful steps for how to reframe your thoughts
Recognizing your own style and your partner’s can help you navigate conflict more effectively. The avoidance conflict style is perpetuated when you feel that you can read your partner’s mind. You decide in advance that they will react poorly or disagree with you, so you avoid the conflict altogether. To resolve this cause of conflict avoidance, learn some self-calming strategies. You might try meditation, practicing a positive mantra, praying, or using a grounding technique.
